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# AP Calculus AB

An interactive log for students and parents in my AP Calculus class. This ongoing dialogue is as rich as YOU make it. Visit often and post your comments freely.

## Tuesday, October 04, 2005

As you can probably assume, the picture to the left is an image portraying Sysiphus. He has so much on his shoulders, so much pressure to get that rock going without failing, but he knows he is set up to fail. In calculus we are being set up like Sysiphus, we have a lot on our shoulders, but we are not to fail, but to succeed.. I feel as if I have set myself up to fail.

I am doing this blog for many reasons. One being, I am still at that point where I am contemplating- to stay in or to leave. And by doing this blog, I am hoping it will help me with my decision. But to be honest, I see no progress in myself, you guys or Mr. K did not fail me, I failed you. If you have not noticed, I have not been in class for the last two days. I have already disappointed myself, but also you guys! Being in this class does have its ups and downs. Its so frustrating when its so quiet but then we get this spark of hope that we are going somewhere as a group. I guess another reason why I am doing this blog is because it may be my last. I dont know yet. It may not. You might see me tomorrow morning in class, you may not.. If you see me there, that means I am giving it another try, and if you dont see me there, I give my apologizies to you all, I didnt mean to let anyone down. We are all in that class for a reason.. believe it or not..*whisper* People think that we're that smart and capable of doing this!

I guess this can be either my TESTblog, or a final blog. So one thing that frustrated me so much was logs! I HATE LOGS! Well, when I went to get some help from Mr. K, and was shown the answer and how to do it, i was thinking to my self "THATS IT?!" I think I tend to look at things a little more difficult than it really is. I was so shocked when I found out that that is all you have to do! I FELT SMART ;)

One thing I have come accross in the 'real world' is feeling like Sysiphus. I had a talk with Mr. K, and he says he sees no effort. I see no effort myself.. SOMEONE! kick me in the butt and tell me to put some effort into this. I guess, i feel as if, every time I attempt to do the homework, I am like hey I can do this! But once I stumble accross a question where I dont know what I am doing, i give up! Unlike Sysiphus he has a rock on his shoulders, I have a lot on my shoulders.. but thats not an excuse to quit! I knew from the start that I was taking a heavy load, and I was willing to do that. I know a lot of these things. Maybe I am frustrated with my ankle and just the way this school year has started.. WHATEVER it is! I still shouldnt quit. I AM NOT A QUITTER. I do not like to quit or give up. ( i know this is long, but and im rambling on and on, but i need a place to let this out and maybe i can come to an answer!)

* A note to MR. K- if and only if i decide to go to class, do not be surprised with my mark on the test. but please be glad that i stayed. If i do stay, I will promise to try. If I do not show up, I am sorry.
*A note to you guys- I am also sorry.

Feel free to comment and voice your opinion, because really I do not know what to do! HELP!

• At 10:59 PM CDT,  Glenney said…

STAY! I MISS YOU! Everyone will mention how much I complain about not having you in class! C'mon! Please =)

• At 11:24 PM CDT,  Chris said…

I personally don't know you, all I know is that you are in my class. But still, in my opinion, you shouldn't give up. We are all here for the reason that people believe in our intelligence and that they believe in our ability to succeed. It's not that you would be failing anyone if you were to choose to leave, but it seems that it would upset Glenny and somewhere down the road you might also be upset that you left.
I'm sure that we all feel like sysiphus from time to time because we are dealing with hard material for high school students such as ourselves. We all get stumped on the occasional question, and there is no shame in that.
We are all being set up like sysiphus, however because we are so few, we should all push the rock as a team so we can get it to the top of the mountain.(May seem wierd coming from the guy who always works by himself, but still.....)
p.s.(ankles heal in time, but an opourtunity to get ahead in a field like this while you are young doesn't come back)

• At 11:35 PM CDT,  Mr. Kuropatwa said…

MJ, that was a very brave post. You have earned my utmost respect. Whatever you decide.

For what it's worth, I think you've got the ability to succeed in this class. As you said, for a variety of reasons, you haven't yet matched your effort to your ability. But that's old. You've heard me say it before.

I sincerely hope you choose to stay in the class. Yes, the test will be hard. You might even fail. That's the effort equation again. But it's just one test of many. We've got a long way to go between now and June 30th and there will be lots of opportunities to make up a poor grade on one test.

I think the real decision you have to make is: are you willing to put in the effort. If yes, stay. If not, that's your decision and no hard feelings. ;-)

Looking at the previous two comments it looks like choosing to stay is also making a choice to remain in a very supportive environment. We're starting to work together more like a team. I'm very happy about that. I think the courage you demonstrated writing this post may be a catalyst cementing the team together. You've made a significant contribution to this group; thank you.